Thursday, 4 February 2010

i never realised before how exhausting grief is.

it's one of the reasons i'm scared of returning to work.

my house is in uproar (we are having some work done) and there are things everywhere. and in my grief and misery i haven't been keeping on top of any of the admin of our lives.

and i'm so tired.

i could sleep ten hours a night - normally eight is plenty - and still be tired.

i wonder if i will ever feel efficient again.

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work was OK. i got a bit emotional when talking to two of the people there, but i was OK. and that's difficult to accept, but i think i'll be ok going back.

a couple of people told me i looked un-stressed.

if that's true, i wouldn't recommend a pregnancy loss as a method of de-stressing.

3 comments:

biojen said...

What you probably look is sad, people say the weirdest things. I hope it is not too tough for you to go back. Take it easy on yourself.

Maddie said...

I feel exhausted too. The last couple of weeks it seemed worse so I actually went to the doctor and had some blood tests - all normal so I assume it's the grief. I've just slept for 11 hours.

I can't seem to keep up with the admin of our lives either. I don't think I looked stressed either - I'm too sad to get stressed about the things I used too. I'm not sure why someone would say that though - stressed would really be the better option than what we're going through.

Maddie x

B said...

jen, don't they just....

i hope you're doing a little better maddie. i'm thinking of you (and you too jen)