Monday, 1 February 2010

Today I went to York for the day. I caught the train in the morning and met my mum and dad there. We had lunch and tea and coffee and wandered the streets, visiting shops. Spending time together.

I've been catching trains on my own since I was seventeen and started to go to university open days. (Wow, that's just about half my life ago.) I've always been confident. I've never been bothered about getting on a train alone.

Today, though. Today it was really hard.

I've not been further than five miles away from D since this happened. It was really hard getting on the train. Travelling a hundred miles away.

I did it. It was hard. But I did it.

Things that used to be second nature to me, that I never even thought twice about - they're not as simple any more.

It really is hard to realise that I'm not the same me I've always been.

2 comments:

Maddie said...

I feel like I've lost a lot of my confidence since this has happened. In social situations I'm never quite sure if I'm coming across as 'normal' anymore. I'm not sure if this is result of what happened or because I've been isolated for so long.

I had to go into the office yesterday (there was a good outcome) but couldn't face the thought of going in by myself so DH had to come home from work to drive me in.

Maddie x

B said...

Normal isn't the same any more, is it? I miss not worrying about that kind of thing.

I'm glad the office meeting had a good outcome, that must be a relief for you. I'm glad your DH could drive you there too. I'm sure it was terrifying so well done for doing it.